HOW TO SOLVE PROBLEM OF LACK OF MONEY IN RELATIONSHIP.

It's with happiness I'm writing this at this moment of the day. In our earlier discussion of 5 killers of happiness in relationship, we talked about an important factor which is always a problem in relationship between couple. Read it  here..

 One of  these problems is called 'money'. We discussed how money can kill happiness in marriage/relationship and I promised we'd discuss how to solve this problem.

Before we begin to solve the puzzle there are facts we ought to know about money.

MONEY IS BAD, AND MONEY IS GOOD.  I got you confused? Yes! Please don't be confused and just let me explain.

The bible says money is the root of all evil, and the same bible says money answers all things.

Let me explain these two contrasting concepts to you to make it more understandable.

1. Money is the root of all evil means a lot of atrocities committed in the world today can be traced to money.

The money ritualists kill because they want money.

Many people cheat on their spouse because of money.

Brothers kill themselves because of money.

Sisters snatching husbands of themselves because of money

Politicians in the world kill not just to rule their nations but to also acquire more money.

The drug dealers on the street sell those life endangering substances because of money.

People go into trafficking and prostitution because of money 

Nations fight war and break up in the name of territorial claim because they want to make more money.

2. Money answers all things means for you to acquire whatever you desire in life, money is needed.

You can't feed your family without money.

You can buy clothes or shoes without money.

You can't build house without having money.

That car you have or desire to have can only be bought with money.

It takes money to get a good treatment at the hospital.

Having enough money helps a nation to be able to meet her obligations to her citizens.

You can't make your hair by telling the stylist a story but by paying money.

So what does this mean? It means money itself is not the evil, but the selfish obsession, and wrongful means some people are willing to use in getting the money is what makes it evil. Making money in a legitimate way is not evil and can never be evil and that's the reason we must not think of money as something we don't need. Everybody needs money but the means with which you acquire it is what defines its context.

SO HOW CAN WE SOLVE THE PROBLEM OF LACK OF MONEY IN MARRIAGE?

1. MAKE SURE YOU HAVE MORE THAN 'ONE' SOURCE OF INCOME.

The study shows that 95% of average millionaires have more than one sources of income. A wise man must have and do more than one thing to make money. There's nothing wrong in picking up additional job if you can't create one for yourself. You can never have enough of what you need if where your money comes from is just one source because when that only one job or business is not doing well again it's going to affect you and your family. I usually encourage couple to have at least 'FOUR' sources of income between them. each should have two so that they may be able to cushion themselves with the income from one if the other isn't doing well.

2. SPEND WISELY.

There's a popular saying that people who buy what they don't need would sell what they need when they lack money. This is pure truth but there's a thing, not only those who buy what they don't need that are in danger; those who buy extravagant things when they can't afford it would also sell it  bellow its worth when they lack money. You earn $1,000 per month and you buy shoes of $850, how do you want to survive with that lifestyle? or you just saved up $10,000 and you want to buy a new car that's worth $15,000, you're even thinking of picking up loan to balance the payment on the car because you can't wait to start enjoying the car. The car is not an investment but a liability; it depreciates and not appreciates. Who are you deceiving? You can't live this way and have happiness in your marriage. What happens if you can't remit the loan payment? You'd have no option but watch your car taken away for a price way below its true market value. And when this happens your wife is bound to feel some discomfort through you irrational attitude. There's a saying that everything we do to ourselves affects those who love us. This is a fact and no one should do something like that at all.

3. NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU EARN, YOU MUST HAVE A BUDGET.

Why nations make budget is so they won't spend beyond their capacity. You should plan for everything you spend money on and cut out unnecessary expenditure in order to increase your savings and fortune. Budget before you start spending and not the other way round. Some people only start budgeting the moment they see their money dwindling; they spend first and budget later, which is not the right way to live. You should live by this attitude.

4. HAVE A GOOD PERCEPTION ABOUT MONEY.

what you see money as has a long way in determining how you fare in your marriage. Money should be seen as an investment tool which brings dividends for you to help your family with and not something to boast among your friends. Some people (including men and women) can't wait to have enough money so they can throw that birthday party they've been telling their friends about and get indebted when the party is over. They want to be the talk of the town and would rick anything for it. Having a good mindset about money would help one not to do rash things. Some intending couple in this part of the world (Africa) are ready to take a loan to fund their wedding ceremony while those who won't take loan but have little saved up would spend everything on the wedding celebration of one day. They forget there won't be any money to run the marriage when the wedding ceremony is over and thereby put themselves under financial pressure. This kind of wedding might not survive the test of time if the financial storm comes knocking on the door of their marriage at the early stage. SO no one should engage in this kind of behaviour.

5. ONLY SPEND WHAT REMAINS AFTER YOU'VE SAVED AND NOT SAVE WHAT REMAINS AFTER YOU'VE SPENT.

There's a need to put saving above spending in your to do list. A little drops turn to oceans is what I hear. Not only can little drops turn to ocean but the ocean it creates can become a source of fish for you in the future. Having a frugal habit can help you save a lump sum which could be used for investment purpose in the future. Money should be a slave to you and not you a slave to money; make money work for you instead of you working for money. When you work for money it will always rule you and give you uncomfortable conditions in life. Investing your money in a progressive and profitable business is an avenue to make more money to run your life and your family. So it's healthy and helpful if you imbibe this culture.

6. BE GENEROUS BUT NOT FOOLISH.

Ever wondered why Bill Gate will forever be among the richest people in the world? The answer is because he's charitable. He's generous and the more he gives the more God blesses him. Every blessing God gives us is so we could turn it around and use that same blessing to bless other people. God values and believes in multiplication and does not want the gift he gives you to end with you; He wants you to be a source of blessing to others in the world.

 ALL THE RICHEST PEOPLE IN THE WORLD HAVE ONE THING IN COMMON, THEY'RE ARE ALL 'GIVERS'. THEY'RE PHILANTHROPISTS WHO REMAIN SELFLESS IN NATURE. THINK OF BILL GATE, WARREN BUFFET, MARK ZUCKERBERG, ALIKO DANGOTE, HENRY FORD, AND THE WESTERN NATIONS WITH THEIR PROVISION OF FOREIGN AIDS TO THE DEVELOPING NATIONS OF THE WORLD. GENEROUSITY WORKS AND IT CAN HELP YOU IF YOU BEGIN TO DO IT. IT'S WHY THEY SAY "GIVERS NEVER LACK".

BUT BEING GENEROUS IS NOT THE SAME AS BEING ILLOGICAL. GENEROUSITY IS NOT GIVING THE ONLY MONEY YOU HAVE TO FEED YOUR FAMILY TO SOMEONE ELSE TO FEED THEIR OWN FAMILY. YOU HAVE TO BE REASONABLE IN WHAT YOU'RE DOING.

7. WORK AND LET YOUR PARTNER WORK.

In Africa where I come there's what they call 'full house wife'. This is a wife who does no daily task as occupation but sits at home and just wait for the man to bring everything home while she's at home baby sitting her children.  She waits for her husband to come home and give her money before she buys anything. The truth is not doing anything at all is a source of frustration for some women not to talk of not being able to provide enough for her needs. It's unnecessary at this time of economic woes to tell a woman to sit at home and not work when she's not Oprah Winfrey (even Oprah doesn't sit back and fold her hands at home despite all the money she has. Even Bill Gate won't support that idea of making his wife a full house wife despite all he has. A woman also has a destiny to fulfill which transcends just being a house wife. Work and let your woman work so she can be your life boat when your financial ship is sinking at the Island of economic meltdown. IF YOU CAGE  A WOMAN NOT TO WORK AND YOU CAN'T PROVIDE ALL SHE NEEDS FINANCIALLY, YOU'RE ALREADY GIVING HER THE REASON TO GIVE YOU HELL IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH HER.

8. DIVERSIFY YOUR INVESTMENT TO IMPROVE YOUR FINANCIAL FORTUNE.

I heard Mark Zuckerberg (The owner of facebook) is now the owner of whatsapp. Why? The answer is simple, and it is diversification. Business men know that there's a possibility of not having enough return on an investment at a certain time, so when one well is drying up they fetch water from the other well they've dug and drink its water. When you have financial option it helps to ease the tension of money in marriage. If you want to have a successful marriage filled with no financial pressure you should give in to diversification of investment.

Therefore it's important to have money to run the family and MAKE THE MONEY IN THE RIGHT WAY. Let us do our part in making our own lives better while God does HIS part in giving us more happiness we desire in life. 

END.

May God give us happiness in life.

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Kindly drop them in the comment box below the post and I promise to get reply.

Thanks' For Being There,

Adebiyi Abraham.